Leadership Lesson for Parents

Oct 1, 2014 by Jim and Jerolyn Bogear

 

4 things Every Parent, Every Leader Must “Be”:

We often say that if you don’t win at home you really don’t win anywhere else. We believe this is certainly true. Oh you and I may be successful by the world’s definition, but we believe it isn’t about success it is about significance.

In having opportunities over the years to lead organizations, teams, events, etc. we believe that we must lead well as parents at home. This leadership lesson can easily be applied to leaders but we think as parents this is where it needs to begin. Lead well at home. As you do this, we are convinced you will lead well in other arenas of your life, career, and calling. It starts at home!

Be consistent:

In our lives of parenting one of the things we have learned is to be consistent with our kids. Our son and youngest daughter both played travel ball. One of the things that I wanted to see from the umpires is consistency. They would miss calls, and make mistakes, like we all do. Those things happen. But not being consistent in the way they called the game was frustrating for the parents, coaches, but especially the players. I honestly felt bad for both teams. It is frustrating because the players do not know how things are being called. We used to tell our kids you have to adjust to the way the umpire is calling the pitches. Figure out and learn his strike zone and adjust. But in those games where no one knew what that was as it was constantly changing, it became frustrating for both the pitchers and the hitters.

Parents in our parenting we need to be consistent in our discipline, ways we act in handling situations, and how we love, affirm, and care for our children. They need to know how you call the pitches. Be Consistent.

Be honest:

Do your best to speak truth in love but speak truth. Live truth. Not only honest in our own lives and parenting by being trustworthy and honest people, but also honest in the sense of being vulnerable in letting your kids see you in real life. Honest with your emotions and allow them to see you as a person. In other words be real, be authentic. Be honest with yourself and allow your children to see. We do want to add a word of caution or clarification here. This does not mean your children know all your stresses or the concerns of your work or the family financial issues. They do not need nor are they responsible to handle that burden. That is a parent’s responsibility not a child’s. Be aware and be the parent here in discerning what or how much is appropriate. Be Honest!

Be strong/firm:

You are not to be your child’s best buddy. Be a parent and discipline them. Stand strong in this area. We have often said one of the most grace-filled things we ever did with and for our children was to discipline them. This was when it was done in love and for correction, never if in anger or insecurity. This one often ties in with being consistent, but it is easy to get tired and allow our disciplining to slip. We begin to allow them to “get away” with behavior that before was inappropriate. Stay strong and stand firm. Your children will appreciate you for it…someday; we guarantee it.

Be contagious:

Have fun and live life to its fullest. Be a parent that your kids enjoy being around, not simply cower in fear of you. It used to be so true in watching past generations and growing up years ago, kids are to be seen and not heard. It was as if we had them only to be our servants. Now, we have always been strict and had our kids doing chores and helping out with the family needs of everyday life of house and home, but we also pitched in and worked. Moms and dads do so much. Some of us have done way too much for our kids and taught them that the world revolves around them. We have communicated that they will be waited on hand and foot. Some of us have “used” our children to do everything and wait on us. Neither is right. Live your life and parent your children with a right attitude, an enjoyable personality, and a spirit that is contagious. Help them laugh and enjoy times at home. Help them have fun and be kids. Help them take responsibility seriously, have a good work ethic and a positive attitude in all. How? By being contagious in living our life and modeling for them that right attitude both in good and bad situations, we can influence others for good. Be positive. Be Contagious!

How can you be a better leader at home?

~Jim and Jerolyn