Are You Ready for a Relationship?

Mar 27, 2014 by Jim and Jerolyn Bogear

 

It seems like for most people every drive in our body is to seek a romantic relationship with one special person. Our culture is quick to emphasize that necessity as well. The problems arise when we either seek that relationship with the wrong person OR we are simply not ready for a relationship.

We’ll deal with thoughts on finding the right person later. But first, let’s see if you are even ready for a serious relationship.

Am I completely comfortable with myself? Before you can give of yourself to another human being, you must first know yourself and be okay with who you are. Too many people try to find another person to complete them and everyone falls short. Every human relationship will disappoint us at some point. The only One who will never fail us is Jesus.

So ask yourself, who am I?

• What do I like to do?
• What are my strengths and my weaknesses?
• What do I value?
• Who do I want to become?
• What are my life goals?
• What kind of people make me a better person by hanging around them?

For many years we have discussed our IQ to measure intelligence. EQ is measuring your emotional intelligence. Recently, the buzz is your CQ, how well you get to know the community you live in. So we are going to look at your RQ – Relationship Quotient. How is yours?

Spiritual Barometer:

• What are your values?
• How strong are you in your own spiritual health?
• Who or what are your resources to help develop you in your spiritual health other than the person you are romantically interested in?

Emotional Barometer:

• What is my emotional health? Where am I at right now? What can I currently bring into a relationship?
• Do you tend to be needy or are you a giver?
• How dependent are you?
• How secure or insecure are you?

Physical Barometer:

• Do I have time in my life for a relationship?
• What am I willing to sacrifice to add value to a relationship?
• What is my reason for the relationship?

The answers to these questions will help you on the way to deciding if you are prepared to give yourself completely to another person. Romantic relationships take a lot of time and selflessness to build a healthy relationship. Going into one as a conscious decision rather than a hormonal or cultural one, will help you build a godly, lasting relationship that is good for both of you.

Watch our website in the next couple of months for a complete relationship-ready diagnostic.

~ Jim and Jerolyn