Hold You, Daddy, Hold You.

May 21, 2013 by Jim and Jerolyn Bogear

Several years ago when our youngest (Gabby) was a toddler, I would arrive home from the office usually with arms full of stuff. As I would open the screen door and begin to turn the knob on the front door, Gabby would hear it. She would get up from whatever she was doing, from wherever she was in our small rental home, and head to the door to greet her daddy. For quite some time it was literally a daily occurrence that she would have the same routine no matter when it was that I would arrive in the evening.

As soon as I opened the door, before I could make it into the house, she would be on the move and getting close to me. She would move as fast as her little toddler legs would carry her wobbling towards me, arms outstretched as high as she could get them, saying, “Hold you, Daddy, hold you.”

I could have said, “Not again today. Daddy’s hands are full. I don’t have time for this. Or in some other way reject her call for a hug, physical connection with her daddy, and expression of love. But NO WAY!

With her running toward me saying those words, my heart would melt each time. I would let go of whatever I had in may hands, drop down to meet her on her level, and scoop her up into my arms letting her “hold me.”

Let me just say that never got or gets old. Every day was a new and exciting opportunity for us to connect, hold each other, and squeeze tight in sharing some daddy/daughter time and love for one another. I loved it! I still love it. She just returned from college for the summer and once again we embraced and held onto one another tightly.

What does your child need from you? For all our kids there are different ways to express or connect with them. You can get on the floor and wrestle, play catch, work on a project…the ideas are endless but the principle remains the same.

• Do you respond or do you push them away?
• Do you ignore their request for you to show your love for them, or do you embrace their desire to “hold you,” spend time with you, or simply be with you?
• How are you and I responding to the desires and needs of our children?
• How are we communicating our love and their value?
• What are we communicating to them…I am busy and don’t have time for you or affirming them and your love for them?

By the way, it might not always be for them. Maybe some of these moments are as much about us needing the love as it is expressing our love for them.

~Jim